Marching Through the Madness

Skipping past a blurry February, I dived into my natal day month knowing it was going to be bat shit crazy. It was about to get wilder than a Western, more vivid than an acid trip with Hunter S Thompson, more extra than Love Island… d’ya get me fam?

Event enquiries were backed up longer than the lorry queues at Dover (see the ludicrously damaging Brexit for more), and I was looking at some mind-boggling potential sales of over a million (with my previous all-time high sitting around the 750k AED mark). To be fair, a considerable chunk of proposals never quite get over the line for a multitude of reasons, so perhaps expectations in the office were set a little too high.

Weaving my way through the madness of the month has been fierce in the extreme, more so than usual by a long way. I’m on track for another new personal best this month, with a more realistic prospect of clocking the 850k AED mark (making only the 2nd time I’ve clocked ¾ million).

Alongside that, we hosted our first staff party since Covid (almost two years to the day since we closed the business). The salesperson of the year award is now defunct, presumably due to the one-horse nature of the race, and yet – somehow – I still walked home with some silverware (I became one of the first members of staff to secure a place in the Solutions Hall of Fame; quite literally, Fame at last).

The big boss treated me to a cheeky all-inclusive staycation in the Rixos Ras Al-Khaimah (the neighbouring Emirate to Dubai), which was lovely but sadly not stress-free. Having the phone constantly blowing up with event negotiations it was a bit too stressful as far as birthdays go (but I’ve definitely had a lot worse – as anyone who’s been with me in a court of law on my special day will testify).

My birthday brunch was lovely despite the fairly lame turnout, mainly due to my exceptionally poor planning of the whole thing. Clearly, 48 hours’ notice wasn’t any way near enough time for most of the homies… shout out to those awesome peeps that did make it, mucho gracias.

But alas, March ended up as a record-breaking month – not just for my good self, but for the (recently-reformed) sales team, and the company in its entirety. March then, was the storm before the calm as we march towards the holy month of Ramadan.

Yet we have indeed, as the boss predicted during his doomsday speech two years ago, come back from the brink even stronger – we now have 14 incredible venues throughout the UAE. The post-Covid journey has been a tough and gritty one but fascinating nonetheless, and I’m 100% sure I’m not the only looking forward to smashing a lot more records in the months to come.

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